15 Dating Horror Stories From Reddit That Will Make You Feel Better About Being Single
September 20, 2017
At Hush, we scoured the internet for the worst date stories we could. Looking through these, you’ll say a little prayer of thanks if you’re still single.
1. “I invited a girl I was seeing to watch me play hockey for the first time. Ended up breaking my femur. Was in a wheelchair for 6 months. She dated me. Always felt like a pity relationship.” - anonymous
2. “I went on a blind date where the restaurant caught on fire, and I slammed her foot in the car door breaking two bones. When your blind date ends at the ER you are going home alone.” - _Heath
3. “I’ve been on a lot of bad dates, but here are the first two to pop into my head.
1) I went on a first date where the dude took my phone and wouldn't give it back, and then bit me when I tried to take it. Left a bruise for a few weeks.
2) Went on a different first date where the guy's dad died while we were at the movies. Wasn't a bad date necessarily, but the fact that he got a call from his sister telling him there was an emergency sucked. And then not knowing how to console him in the following weeks was tough, I'm bad with loss. I never know what to say or do, especially since we were casual and It was hard to know how to go about everything.” - anonymous
4. “Meet one of the hottest guys I've laid eyes on. Shamelessly flirt in line at the store. Exchange numbers. I'm on cloud nine. Agree to a date after I get off work one night. Picks me up and takes me to his house, in a decommissioned cop car, with an open container, pours wine when we arrive, demands to buy me new shoes, and throws his pictures of him and his ex-girlfriend at me. As I get up to leave, he throws his wineglass on the floor and tells me that I can't leave, and I can't call a cab since there is no reception where we are. Tries to block the door, I wriggle through his arms and the door jam, and run 2 miles down a dark road until I get cell reception. Called a friend and hid on the side of the road in the bushes until I get picked up. Oh, he calls me the next day, leaving a rambling 2 minute message, in tears, weaving between apologizing and demanding I call him back.” - Alexthegirl
TL;DR: Ran away from a crazy, hot guy.
5. “First date I called her the wrong name. Second date I lit her hair on fire while trying to be smooth and light her cigarette. Six years later we're happily married. Don't count out the bad dates.” - anonymous
6. “He projectile vomited.
7. “I told my girlfriend it would be a romantic idea to get up uber-early and watch the sunrise together, forgetting that neither of us were morning people. She disliked the idea, but wanted to encourage me to come up with other, better ones, so she agreed.
We half-consciously sat on a snow-covered bench in the dark, each trying to make sure the other stayed awake. After about a half-hour, we realized it was too cloudy. The sun had already risen and we didn't see a damn thing. We parted ways and went back to bed.” - stitch99
8. “We talked about avocados for an hour because it was the only thing we had in common.” -nutellatime
9. “I found out during that she was actually married. Not even legally separated, or something. No, I did not go on another date with her.” - TerminusEst86
10. “He just... wouldn't stop talking. Maybe he was amazingly nervous, but it was literally a nonstop loop of him talking. And that wouldn't have been so bad but we went to see a movie after we grabbed a bite to eat, and even during the film, he kept murmuring to me through out the whole thing.
Imagine four or so hours with someone who's just talking at you with nary a pause. After a while, it just turns into a droning noise because I couldn't really interact with him in any way. I was exhausted at the end of it, and really glad I had driven myself to meet up, versus having him pick me up at home.
It didn't help that any time he or I would touch-- hands brushing, walking around and accidentally bump into another-- he would cringe visibly and move away. Like, why did he even ask me out? The world may never know.
I declined his request for a second date.”
11. “Years ago I went out to dinner with a guy I'd met online. He seemed pretty normal, but during the entire hour long meal, he didn't say a single word besides "yes" or "no." Nothing. Any question I asked got a one word answer, and he didn't ask me a single thing about myself. It was so bad that I caught the woman at the next table giving me pitying looks.” - atheologist
12. “She asked me if I would try to fight someone off or catch a bullet for her on the first date. Without think I said "hell no you must be out your damn mind". Tried to apologize but she didn't seem to accept it. Who asks that on a first date anyway. She got offended and we both ate our burritos in silence.” - Mczepplin
13. “I've got a great one. Started chatting with a girl on Facebook that I had worked with a few years prior, and eventually she invited me out for drinks. About ten minutes into the date, she leans in and tells me she's still bleeding from her abortion. In a panic I ask if she needs me to take her to the hospital or call somebody or something, to which she calmly replies: "No, it's okay, this happens every time." - anonymous
14. “The kid got pulled over by a bike cop, brought me to watch him play video games with his buddy and then told me he loved me. This was a first and last date.” - Grotskylilbiotch
15. “He took me to an Italian restaurant and engaged the waiter in an eternity of clueless wine talk before ordering a bottle, at which point he was carded and busted for using a fake ID. I was 23 and the guy insisted that I should still drink while he had diet coke. All the tables were super close together on the floor and the couple at the next table laughed at him and kept toasting him with their wine glasses. I felt sorry for him until later when he surprise-groped me in the parking lot and when I didn't want to kiss him he asked if I was a lesbian. I said, "umm... yes, yes I am." and he drove me home without saying another word, but every once in a while randomly chuckling evilly to himself.” - Annadyne
Do you have a first date horror story? We’d love to hear it. Pre-register for the Hush dating app now. It's free.